subtle dildo

‘Subtle Dildo’ is a ‘Where’s Waldo’ for the Modern Era

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If you were alive during the ’90s, you likely have warm feelings towards Where’s Waldo. Martin Handford’s picture book games starred a huge panorama of tiny figures, and the reader was meant to find Waldo (or Wally overseas), a red-and-white striped traveller. Handford’s immaculately detailed work meant you could spend hours trying to find Waldo — and lots of other stuff besides.

Where’s Waldo was huge. There were comics, a saturday morning cartoon, CD-ROM games and more. While it may not have the merchandising opportunities, an Instagram has updated Waldo for millennials. They just made a subtle change — swapping out the stripey nerd for a dildo.

Subtle Dildo debuted February 2, 2014, the day of Super Bowl XLVIII:

#superbowl

A post shared by Subtle Dildo (@subtledildo) on

You’d be forgiven for thinking this is just four guys hanging out on the couch watching the game. But if you look a little closer, you’ll notice something amiss. There’s a weird shadow on the lampshade… and it looks surprisingly phallic.

Of course, we’re big fans of dildoes here. We’ve talked about their history, their use in protest and how funny they look attached to a drone. It makes sense — dicks are funny, fake things are funny — therefore fake dicks are hilarious.

But the semi-anonymous creators of Subtle Dildo aren’t content to just rely on the cheap joke. The images are perfectly composed. Each tells a story in one shot — often having nothing to do with the dildo. For example, this hat stacking contest looks pretty intense:

https://www.instagram.com/p/BAfSS3zotI9/?taken-by=subtledildo

And this one is Star Wars fan-fic in one panel:

This one features an, uh, unfortunate accident:

Sometimes houses need auditing, too. Help your floors go clear with @swiffter #scientology #fear #goingclear

A post shared by Subtle Dildo (@subtledildo) on

And this one warns of the dangers of Muppets outside:

We don't mean to alarm you, but there may be a boogeyman or boogeymen in the house! #fear #death …dad?

A post shared by Subtle Dildo (@subtledildo) on

How did you do — did you find any of the dildos? If so, congratulations! If not — keep looking. A hint: You won’t always find the dildo where you would expect to.

Sadly, there hasn’t been a new Subtle Dildo in a little over a year — but there are almost 100 to choose from. And some of them are really hard. (Unlike the dildos themselves which look kinda floppy.)