We love RuPaul’s Drag Race so much, that we’ll be covering it each week. But we won’t be going onto Reddit to find out which queens have been eliminated ahead of time. So all our opinions and predictions are based purely on viewing and we appreciate no one spoiling future eliminations in the comments — have fun, ladies!
This week, the good gremlins at LOGO unveiled the contestants of RuPaul’s Drag Race season eight. Hopefully, they’ll follow our advice to avoid a snooze-fest like the last season, but until it actually airs on March 7, let’s meet some of the queens and gauge how likely they are to win!
But first (real quick), did you see ex-Drag Racer Jasmine Master’s video rant about how the show is fucking up drag? It was spicy! Basically she says that the show has everyone thinking that anyone can be a queen, and it just ain’t so. Drag queen Nina West responded by praising the show for “evolving” drag. Ooooh, we love us some good cultural conversation between queens, f’real.
Okay, anyways… here they are!
Odds of winning: Moderate. She says she’s the oldest queen this season and the older queens don’t typically do so well. But she’s an aggressive hyper-color bitch who won’t go down easily. In fact, she says she always tries to top herself. A top who wants to top herself? Ooooh, hunney yes!
Bob the Drag Queen
Odds of winning: Low. Comedy queens like Bob either burn out early after it’s revealed that they have no sense of couture or they lose at the end to a glamour queen. But we’ll be yukking it up with Bob all the way to her ham finale.
Odds of winning: Low. He’s a self-described “Britney showgirl”, but that White pop-pageantry has limited mileage. The real Brit-Brit is bonkers though, so she might be good for some drama.
Odds of winning: Pretty good. She’s beloved in Chicago and comes off as authentic as hell. She’ll likely provide a quality good tear-jerking moment too. And wouldn’t it be nice to have another Asian winner? The last one was the Indonesian-Dutch winner Raja from season three.
Chi Chi DeVayne
Odds of winning: Nonexistent. She seems fishy and nice, but that’s just code for boring. Personality drives so much of Drag Race, but as an “all-around entertainer” so far Miss Barry is barely going the speed limit.
Odds of winning: Moderate. She’s got style and can deliver killer face. If she can turn out the gauntlet of acting challenges, she could give the other top 3 queens a real run for their money. We’re also betting she can throw some serious shade if she needs to.
Cynthia Lee Fontaine
Odds of winning: Low. It is a truth universally recognized that Puerto Ricans NEVER win RuPaul’s Drag Race; why is that? Is it the accented English? Is it racist that we just said that? Her sincerity might help her get to the final four though.
Odds of winning: Low. She’s as interesting as fishloaf and less funny than she thinks. She’ll either trip quickly out of the gate or vanish without much adieu in the middle.
Odds of winning: Decent. She’s actually pretty funny without trying too hard and deadpan comedy goes a long way in Drag Race. As a “stripper-punk rock hybrid” she’s also got the edginess that’ll help her get far.
Odds of winning: Low. She’s fishy and likely has some tricks up her sleeve, but what we’ve seen of her so far hasn’t wowed us. Smalls will have to learn to go big if she wants to prove her royalty amongst the other queens.
Odds of winning: Decent. If she busts out her outrageous drag early on and can sew, she’ll be a real contender, especially since her look is inspired by hard-bitten nightlife and camp: two ingredients Ru loves.
Odds of winning: Low. She’s kinda an AMC, Golden-age-of-Hollywood style queen, but that old-timey drag is far from the young, cutting-edge drag that the show’s producers want in a winner.
Who do you think will win? Let us know in the comments!